Raathiri. …

Prakruthi yokka cheekati roopam

Thongi choosthu chandamama

Veluthuru tho vennela aata paata

Mabbulu aade dhongaatalu

Pedarasi peddamma kanchi kadhalu

Raagaalaku praanam pose kavulu

Rasikathaku oopiri pose premikulu

Gootiki chere pakshulu

Kondhariki alasata theere samayam

Inkondhariki kunuku padani samayam

Prakruthi yokka cheekati roopam,

My Experiences…

I added some more details to this post. please scroll down to part 2.

soumyassite

  1. Depression..

Part 1:

It happened when my 2nd child was 8 months old. one day one of my friends suddenly asked.. if I was in depression. I used to take care of her son after school. it was just a 2 minute conversation while picking her son from my house. I denied by telling her that I was alright and super busy to get depressed.

but that night I started thinking if I was really in depression.

may be I was in depression, may be that’s why I hear haunting sounds when I am bathing, I am scared to go to the loo with door closed, may be that’s why I feel some one is behind me, watching me , when I am too much involved in conversing with my little one, may be that’s why I am finding too many faults in my husband, who is a perfect gentle…

View original post 1,288 more words

My Experiences…

  1. Depression..

It happened when my 2nd child was 8 months old. one day one of my friends suddenly asked.. if I was in depression. I used to take care of her son after school. it was just a 2 minute conversation while picking her son from my house. I denied by telling her that I was alright and super busy to get depressed.

but that night I started thinking if I was really in depression.

may be I was in depression, may be that’s why I hear haunting sounds when I am bathing, I am scared to go to the loo with door closed, may be that’s why I feel some one is behind me, watching me , when I am too much involved in conversing with my little one, may be that’s why I am finding too many faults in my husband, who is a perfect gentle man to the world, may be that’s why I started thinking my friends don’t want to hang out with me anymore because I am too busy changing diapers and preparing special food.

I live in London, so I knew about children centers, I knew about libraries, i knew about parks, I knew going to the local shops and letting the child play in the toy section for a while is alright… but it was December when my little one was 8 months old… i knew London has everything i need to entertain myself and my little one… may be i was depressed , i didn’t make an effort to connect with my old friends, i didn’t make an effort to make friends who have little children.

May be I was actually confused whom to go to.. I used to feel I don’t belong between the mothers of one year olds.. I used to feel I am the eldest of all of them… because I already have a 10 year old .. I used to listen to what they talk to and smile inside me because i already knew that every plase of growing up is different… i knew those talks are amazing.. i used to think i should not talk out and spoil their little surprises.. so i talked less.. some friends approached me for advices which i did.. that made me more elder in the group…I used to advise new moms about breast feeding, starting nursery, school procedures,

toilet training, school dinners, behavioral problems, everything and anything.. so am I an elder in the group or a friend? .. so may be I was confused … and felt I don’t fit in..

What about friends I already had, moms of my 10yr old son’s friends. its not their fault. they were my only well wishers. They were busy with their own lives. They thought they should not disturb me or visit me often because I need rest. They thought I am not flexible now to go out and about with them like before. They thought they can’t bother me by visiting anytime they want. Sometimes that little one may be sleeping, with a knock on the door he may wake up to cry and throw tantrums, may be I will be feeding him and when he sees someone at home that may be his opportunity to stop eating to go and play with them. But my friends were amazing they never  gave phones to him as a way of getting him to play with them. So, may be I felt lonely till that friend of mine pointed out.

I was addicted to coffee and tea which I never had before. I used to have 4 or 5 cups of coffees some days. I used to cry easily for little things. I stopped talking to my parents. I showered once in two or three days. I don’t remember shampooing in a gap of 4 months. I combed my hair only when I needed to. and then I didn’t need to comb as it was only one strand. I thought I was there only to cook and serve for the family. Then, when I gave this whole process a name called depression , it was easy. I made big changes to my life.

I will post that bit next week , please wait and look for this page to be updated. If you like this page, please follow my blog on the down right corner of this page.

Thank you for your patience

 

cell phonaina kakapothini

Cell phonaina kakapothini ,  nee chethulalo ninduga!!

Current billunaina kakapothini,  nee manasulo medhalaga!!

Cuppu coffee naina kakapothini,  nee indhriyalanu santhimpaga!!

Remotu aina kakapothini,  nee thodu nai muravaga!!

bhugarbhamu lona railu naithe,

gamyamunaku cherchana!!

andhuvalana srinivasuni edhuruchupunu pondhana!!

kanti chivarana badalika naithe,

kalala theeram choopana!!

nidhralona srinivasuni gnapakalanu moyana!!

 

cell phonu naina kakapothini nee chethulalo nalugaga!!

current billu naina kaakapothini nee manasulo medhalaga!!

 

neetinaina kaakapothini dhaahamunu theerchuthu,

gundelona prema motham paataga maaraga,

sahajeevanamulo aanandham tho samayamu gadavaga,

suryasthamayamu vaipu mana nadaka sagaga…

 

cell phonaina kakapothini nee chethulalo nalugaga!!

current billunaina kakapothini nee manasulo medhalaga!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kaarulo shikaaru..

Ala ee chathur chakra motaaru vahanam lo velthunnana..

Mundhu matthuga nidhra pattesindhi..

Prayanam lo nidhra athi priyam naakemo..

Melakuva vachaka chusthe, inkaa chaala dooram vellali.

Eelopu,

Manasu pari pari vidhaaluga parugulu pettindhi,

Manasuni aapadam charithra lo evariki sadhyapadindhi?

Dhaani mundhu nenentha anukunnanu,

Aa chinna chathurasra aakararapu gaaju kitikeelo nunchi bayataku choosaanu kadha,

Aa chetlu, rahadhaarulu venakku velthunnayi,  radio lo paata naa alochanala laage mellaga saaguthondhi..

Oka aangla chitram ‘cars’ lo paata adhi,

‘Find yourself’ antondhi kokila koosinatlu

Inthalone naa vuhaloki oopirila amma vachindhi,

Manasulo puttina chirunavvu pedhala paiki cherindhi. .

Thana roopam kalla mundhu medhili rahadhaari pai chetla tho paatu venakki vellipoyindhi..

Naa venuke vasthondhi emo maa amma

Caaru vegam thaggakunda dhoosukupothondhi… naa Manasu laage

Prayanam ante praanam naaku..

Prathi saari modhati sari anna anuboothi kaluguthu vuntundhi..

Endhuko thelidhu mari..

Chinnappudu godavari urakalu chusinaa inthe anipinchedhi… aa alalu ekkadiki  velthunnayo thelusu kovali anipinchedhi…

Andharu okela vundaru kadha,

Idhi okaanoka samayam lo nenu..

Alochanala railu bandi kadhulthu vundagane… bayata chetlu mayam ayyayi,

Vuru vachesindhani chepthondhi kankreetu adavi…

Illu vachindhi mummy annaru naa pillalu
Thaalam nee dhaggare vundhi kadha annaru maa vaaru…

Anthe, kadha samaptham,

Nija jeevithamlo gruhini ni mari….

Dear Sunrise

Dear sunrise,

How delighted I am to watch you every morning

when you shine your crispy orange rays on my window…

How lighted my home is in the evening,

when you set your bright showers towards my lounge…

Opening my doors to welcome you is my daily routine,

Your amazing mixture of colours is captivating,

Wonder if i can get some motivation,

Trying on different combinations for matching,

I tried looking for you over the sea and the mountain.

you are a feast for the eyes, every where,

The sea view filled my heart with love and peace,

The mountain view filled my soul with freshness and adventure,

They said you are a flaming fire ball staying far away in the universe,

For the earthling, you are the visible hope of the day

Dear Sun rise,

You reach me where ever I am,

I try finding you where ever I am,

we can be together forever..

the only thing,

we cant have a cup of tea together…

Dear Sun rise,

A cup of coffee for a company…

your attempts to win over the night …

and spread over the deep blue sky..

My day starts with a broad smile on the face…